Contemplative Counseling
Becoming more alive, present, and engaged with life.
Desire for Connection
One of the most common desires I see these days is the desire for connection. Connection with oneself, with others, with nature. Connection is an inherent need and the way society continues to develop is pulling us further away from it. We do not have to continue to be pulled away.
Contemplative Counseling is about contacting that connection and developing a relationship with it. It is about uncovering our inherent wisdom, compassion, joy, creativity, and love. It is about becoming clearer, more present, and engaged with life.
It is about revealing our unique gifts and offering them to the world. This is what the world needs more than ever and we can do it together.
Areas of Focus:
Working with relationship challenges
Listening to and witnessing your unique experience
Living in accordance with one’s values and cultivating those values
Changing limiting and harmful beliefs and behavior
Developing self-love and true confidence
Capacity to feel and learn from somatic experience
Deepening intimacy with oneself and others
Meditation and breathing practices
Developing attention and concentration
Learning how to work with one’s mind
Developing emotional awareness and attunement
A Healing Relationship
Relationships are both a source of so much love, joy and connection, and our deepest pains, sorrows, and confusions. Spending time with someone who has your best interest, potential, and well-being in their mind and heart is something I hope every person can have in their life. It creates a haven where relaxation can occur, trust can grow, vulnerability can happen, risks can be taken, and new possibilities can be experienced.
The relationship between counselor and client becomes one of healing, where two people can meet honestly and authentically, learn themselves and each other, and open up in the present moment with grace and courage. Hiding and being something we are not is painful and tiring. This is about undoing that pattern.
I feel like contemplative counseling is, at the heart, about relationship. Whether it's a relationship with oneself, other people, work, activities, or nature, life is an ongoing relationship. How do we operate in relationship with harmony, joy, wisdom, and love? The answer to that question is the essence of what we will do together. In the process of living into that answer, we become more naturally who we are, face our fears, find humor and purpose in the mysteriousness of life, and discover how we most naturally give our gifts to the world.
Mindfulness
Learning and practicing how to use our attention intentionally is primary to benefiting our own lives and the lives of those around us. Being mindful is being present, being present with ourselves, our loved ones, our work, our homes, nature, and all the seemingly insignificant in-between moments of life. By growing our mindfulness, we grow our capacity to be in touch with the moment and whatever skillful means are necessary to act wisely and compassionately. Not being present is the source of our anxiety, depression, resentment, and confusion.
Together, we will practice mindfulness in a few key ways. Mindfulness of body is foundational. Our physical experience (emotions and sensations) is very powerful and incredibly intelligent. Most of us have learned to think about our bodies rather than feel them and what they are trying to communicate to us. When we pay attention to our physical experience, we grow in kindness, strength, and discernment. We can begin to understand our needs and make decisions that benefit our own well-being, which will inevitably translate into benefiting others. When we are in touch with our bodies and emotions, we can also attune to others and be of true service to our loved ones and our community.
Mindfulness of thought is also foundational to this work. Learning how to bring our attention to the thoughts that pass through the mind lessens the power those thoughts have over our lives. We can notice them, question their validity, and choose to open up to other possibilities (which are always there). The thoughts that cause us the most pain were most likely given to us by others (family, society, culture, etc). Becoming mindful of thought gives us choice—true empowerment. We can begin to connect with our heart’s wisdom, the views we deeply desire yet may have been told they are not realistic, practical, or safe. In order to live fully and impact our world beneficially, I believe we need to reconnect with our heart’s wisdom and courageously step in alignment with its powerful knowing.
Uncovering Your Inherent Qualities
Each of us is extremely powerful. We have extraordinary creativity, wisdom, compassion, joy, and insight. When someone is in touch with their inherent qualities, it uplifts everyone. By looking into oneself, feeling our deep intelligence, inquiring into what views we are holding about oneself and others, we can connect with an inherent wisdom that is our birthright. This wisdom can guide us to make the best choices for ourselves and others. It can connect us with a deep, alive peace that exists within and teach us how to think, speak, and act from that place.
The gifts you have are unique because there is no one else like you. When you touch into your unique gifts, you help others feel inspired to do the same. When we share our unique gifts with each other, we can cultivate a shared sense of fulfillment, purpose, and joy. When we bring our unique gifts together we can begin taking action to heal our families, neighborhoods, communities, and society at large. It begins with each one of us diving inside and learning how to swim up to the surface, staying connected to our deep inner knowing. We can do this together. I’d like nothing more!
